Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Grandma- The Obiturary

Mildred Bernice Carnot was born on August 24, 1928 in Hemingford, Nebraska to Louise and Emil Nekuda. For the first twelve years of her life Mildred lived on a farm with her parents that was owned by Mildred's maternal grandparents. When Mildred started kindergarten she didn't speak a work of English as the Czech language was the only thing spoken at home. Mildred spent a lot of time on the farm with her maternal grandmother, Marie (Stumf) Vorovka, and her uncle George Vorovka who was only six years older than her. Mildred's one sibling, Arline, was born when Mildred was seven years old.

At the age of twelve, Mildred and her family moved from Hemingford, Nebraska to Santa Monica, California where her father had the opportunity to work as an electrician. Mildred attended Santa Monica High School and graduated in 1946. After high school Mildred worked in the Santa Monica High School office. World War II ended in December of 1946. Soon after the war ended Mildred met her future husband- a World War II veteran, Jerry John Carnot, at a Czech dance function in La Crescenta. They were married in March 21, 1948 in Santa Monica California.

Mildred and Jerry lived near the USC campus after they were married while Jerry completed his accounting degree. While Mildred was pregnant with their first child, they built a house together in Sherman Oaks, California where they ended up living for the next 42 years. Mildred was on bed rest for the latter part of her pregnancy and was unable to be apart of the daily decisions being made at the house. On one occasion when she was able to make it over to see the house, she found out that her father-in-law had vetoed her decision to have a sunken living room. Apparently, Jerry, his father, and brothers did much of the work on the the house themselves and made some executive decisions without consulting Mildred, which made her quite upset. Mildred and Jerry's first born, Candis, was born on September 7, 1951. They went on to have two more children- Karen on August 6, 1953 and Robert on May 20, 1958.

Over the years Mildred held a number of jobs to bring in extra income for the family. Her next door neighbors the Shroeder's had a dime store that she worked at when her kids were little. When her daughters entered high school Mildred worked at a local elementary school, Dixie Canyon Elementary, so she would have extra money to send her girls to college. In her 50's Mildred worked for Sol Saks, the writer for the television show Bewitched, managing his checkbook and taking notes for him in long hand. She also volunteered at the Los Angeles Zoo.

Mildred traveled all over the world with Jerry, but her favorite place to vacation was in Yosemite where her parents owned a cabin in Wawona. Mildred used to say that when on vacation in Yosemite that time would stand still for her. She loved the peacefulness of the pine tree cover in the forest and the sound of the river flowing near the cabin.

Mildred and Jerry had a large social network of friends which included people they met in the Czech community, neighbors in Sherman Oaks, and parents of their children's friends. They played golf, had bridge parties, saw performances at the Hollywood Bowl, traveled, and had holiday parties with their friends.

In 1993 Mildred and Jerry sold their house in Sherman Oaks and moved to Newbury Park, California to be closer to Mildred's mother. Mildred started to show signs of memory loss as early as 1996. She couldn't remember how to make foods she had always made with ease, she would re-tell the exact same story within a five minute time frame, and her personality started to change. By her 50 year wedding anniversary with Jerry in 1998, Mildred was no longer the same person. Alzheimer's Disease was diagnosed in 2001. In all the years that Mildred had her illness, she did maintain a very sweet and loving personality. She was never angry or cross, despite her frustrations to communicate and make sense of what was happening to her.

Mildred was a soft and kind hearted soul. She was fond of classical music, playing the piano, Scrabble, card games, golf, tennis, cooking gourmet meals, decorating for the Christmas and Easter holidays, keeping her house super clean, and spending time with her family and friends. She was the parent her kids would go to when they wanted something. She would find a way to help them get what they wanted. As a grandparent, Mildred was a wonderful caregiver, generous, fun-loving, and always up for an adventure. As a daughter, Mildred looked after her mother and even after her illness she had some trustworthy helpers in her husband and daughter Candy to carry out her wishes.

Mildred is survived by her mother, three children, three grandchildren and one great-grandchild. After Mildred's husband Jerry passed away in July 2005, Mildred attended the Methodist Church in Thousand Oaks with her daughter and son-in-law most Sundays. Despite the fact she had limited verbal communication and memory these past three years, she was still able to say the Lord's Prayer during Sundays services. We pray that she is in a better place now and that she will rest in peace.

Kari Ann Hong, DDS
1000 Newbury Road, Suite 190
Thousand Oaks, CA 91320
www.familycaredentists.com

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